In today’s issue

🔗 The best links I found this week
📖 Deep dive: 5 ideas for marking a door for IUFD
🩷 Self-care moment: Creating emotional boundaries while providing compassionate care

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🔗 My Favorite Finds This Week

👵 Freebie Printout - Guide for IUFD Visitors
I created a free guide, “5 Tips for Visiting a Loved One After Pregnancy Loss”. You can print this out and recommend visitors scan and read it on their phone before visiting their loved ones. (Get Guide Here)

💬 Honest feedback from loss moms
An L&D nurse asked in the babyloss subreddit "What can I do to make the process of miscarrying or losing a baby easier for you while you are in my care?" The responses were insightful and moving. (Reddit)

💧4.5 CEU credits for bereavement
I haven’t taken this yet (I plan to) but I’ve seen lots of great feedback from those who have taken it. “Perinatal Bereavement Certificate Program” (AWHONN)

📖 Deep Dive

5 Meaningful Ways to Mark a Door for Fetal Demise

When supporting families experiencing pregnancy loss, the details matter profoundly. One of the most overlooked yet impactful aspects of bereavement care is how we mark the door of a patient's room. This simple act of visual communication can prevent devastating moments of misunderstanding.

I recently stumbled upon this Reddit thread (worth a read) of a nurse genuinely asking loss moms, "What can I do to make the process of miscarrying or losing a baby easier for you while you are in my care?". Several moms raised the importance of marking the door. One mom said, “We had a woman from the lab come to draw blood at 2 AM, and she congratulated us. She didn't know, and it was awful for all of us."

These painful encounters are more common than we might think.

I’ve explored five meaningful ways to mark a door that balance respect, privacy, and clear communication:

1. Make a wreath

My new friend, Annemarie, gave me permission to share this beautiful wreath she and a few other staff created. So pretty, right?!

Implementation tip: I found a similar wreath frame on Amazon and you could find some cute faux florals at your local craft store. Use green twine to attach the floral to the wreath.

2. Butterfly Door Hangers

Some hospitals use butterfly symbols as door markers. One facility reports success with this approach, noting that parents appreciate being able to take the butterflies home in their memory boxes afterward.

Implementation tip: These butterflies are a beautiful visual way to mark their door. These ones come with double-sided glue dots. These can be placed anywhere and easily removed without leaving marks.

3. Subtle Pregnancy Loss Magnet

When you have more red tape to deal with or are looking for a more subtle approach, a small magnet can be placed on the door.

Implementation tip: Some hospitals use magnets that can be placed on the door frame or incorporated into the existing room number display.

4. Electronic Alerts

While not a physical door marker, implementing electronic alerts in your charting system creates an additional layer of protection.

Implementation tip: Work with your IT department to create a bereavement flag that appears when any staff member accesses the patient's chart. This can help prepare lab technicians, food service workers, and others before they enter the room.

5. Specialized Door Signage Systems

Some hospitals have implemented color-coded or symbol-based door sign systems.

Implementation tip: One hospital uses a specialized magnet with a subtle lavender ribbon. It's recognized universally throughout their facility but wouldn't be obvious to visitors from other patient rooms.

Navigating Regulatory Concerns

Finding CMS-compliant door markers can be challenging for many hospitals. Here are some considerations:

• Sanitation control: Ensure any door marker can be properly cleaned between uses or is disposable.

• Documentation: Having written protocols for your bereavement marking system can help during regulatory visits. Make sure all the departments are aware of the symbols.

The most important aspect is ensuring all hospital staff—from clinical to support services—understand what these symbols mean and how to adjust their approach accordingly.

By implementing thoughtful door marking systems, we create a critical communication tool that protects vulnerable families from additional trauma during an already devastating experience.

🩷 Self-care moment

Creating Emotional Boundaries While Providing Compassionate Care

"Compassion Fatigue is a secondary traumatic stress disorder resulting from caring for and helping traumatized or suffering people or animals. It is a reaction to the ongoing demands of being compassionate and effective in helping those that are suffering." - Patricia Smith, Founder of the Compassion Fatigue Awareness Project

Three-Minute Boundary Ritual:

Before entering a bereavement room, take three purposeful breaths:

1. Breathe in acceptance, breathe out judgment

2. Breathe in presence, breathe out distraction

3. Breathe in compassion, breathe out the need to fix

This simple practice creates a mental boundary that allows you to be fully present without absorbing overwhelming grief.

Source: Smith, P. (2013). "Interview with Patricia Smith: Founder of the Compassion Fatigue Awareness Project." Notes from a Dog Walker. Retrieved from the Compassion Fatigue Awareness Project.